Accusing someone means charging someone with an offense. Accusing is positive in some way, but when bounds beyond some level, it becomes negatively influenced. Actually, people see what they wanted and it cannot do anything good for us. Actually through blaming we are saying that we are not responsible for our life instead we are giving someone the key to operate our life through a different window. This we are doing involuntary. Just try to accept that life presents many difficulties, undeniable pain and suffering and this is the only thing which make us to blame others. This habitual blaming will become a burden in its long term use. It will make you feel as a powerless person. Can I ask you one question whether you are happy or you feel successful after blaming? The answer is exactly no. Blaming is actually a waste of time and energy. No matter how much faults that others had done and no matter how much you blame others for that fault. It cannot make any change in your life. Those that are damaged are damaged and we cannot regain its time or the thing as it is. It will take your thoughts outside from where it wanted to be to somewhere it was not proportional to. Through this you are actually trying to explore the external reason for your frustrations.
Steps to stop blaming
- Recognize when you accuse others
- We should take time to concentrate our thoughts, because usually what will happen in blaming is that you will not have a clear knowledge about the circumstance, so sometimes you may wrongly accuse others.
- Always try to remember that the person you are accusing will also have the same rights.
- Always try to think that how you will feel if you hurt others.
- Always try to apologize if you wrongly accused someone.
Finally out of our observation and keen study it is very transparent that in the majority of the cases the causes for accusing or finding fault with others are really due to simple and silly matters arising out of our ignorance and emotional imbalance. If we can maintain total awareness and balanced state of the mind, we can definitely avoid it. If we are looking for the other man’s position, most of the time we will not accuse others. We always believe that what we are doing is right. So it is high time that we should not accuse others.
Article Source : https://www.quora.com/How-do-I-stop-accusing-people/answer/Dr-Purushothaman-Kollam-2
